The Eleventh Hour
Rescue me from hanging on this line. I won’t give up on giving You the chance to blow my mind. Would the eleventh hour quickly pass me by? I’ll find you when I think I’m out of time.” – Jars of Clay
Behind everything we construct, the things we raise up, the things in which we trust will provide for us, there waits, with millennia-tested patience, a Mystery that watches over us. And this Mystery observes all our striving and our vain reliance on human willpower and human provision and laughs at it all. Not a laugh that takes pleasure in suffering, but the kind of laugh we ourselves expel when we watch a stubborn child explore just how far he can get away with something before the parent undoubtedly will step in.
Leigh has been fond of quoting lately the old phrase, “If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans.” We are working hard to trust Him, and His timing, in all of this, but the eleventh hour is overtaking us, and we look at our current 44% of funds raised and struggle to shake the dread that we will not be in Germany by the date we are supposed to report (about 2 and 1/2 weeks). We find ourselves making plans for the next few weeks as it seems likely we will still be in the States, still striving to get our pledges up to 80%. What are we to do with ourselves? Should Leigh continue to work? Should we see fundraising as a full-time endeavor even while our own savings waste away? It is a very unsettling time … but, then again, I don’t assume God would have it any other way. While I believe in a God that desires to bless His children, I do not think He takes much thought to their opinions on what schedule this blessing should come, nor on their comfort while waiting. This is not to imply that God is vindictive or careless or out-of-touch with His people - I simply think He is more concerned with the blessing itself than the manner in which it comes.
It is at the eleventh hour God has been known to work. The check in the mail or the call from a relative or a surprise gift from someone you would never expect. God manifesting himself in a manner that causes us to cease trusting these assumptions and constructions we have set up to care for us. Job, in all his sorrow and suffering (and our situation is nothing compared to his), was at the end of his rope, surrounded by theological nitwits who had ceased caring for him the moment they decided to open their mouths and attempt to explain it all. Wasting away, all it seemed he had to look forward to was the approach of a violent storm, a perfect final bow from a horrible experience. That is, until God spoke to him out of the storm.
The eleventh hour. It is no fun. But, from God’s perspective, it is oftentimes a necessary experience.
~ bo
I bet you guys are just holding your breath! I sure hope something happens that knocks your socks off!! Keep us updated! Last days of work coming up right???
love, Kristen
Guys,
Great Post. Bo, you’re an excellent writer. I’m jelouse.
It sounds to me like you’re counting the costs (should or shouldn’t Leigh continue to work? Will your savings be sufficient to sustain you?). I believe God has called us and is calling you to do this. Its cool to watch. In the end, with all this will cost us, is it worth it? Is following the call worth it? I believe God wants us to evaluate and wrestle with this authentically and I believe you’re doing that. We have been and contiue to pray for you guys. Stick with it.
-LW
Excellent post Bo. This is certainly shaping up to be an Ebenezer moment for ALL of us. It is in these moments that we will be able to cling when things on the field get tough. God is good all of the time and yes I agree, while He is not vindictive or careless He is more concerned about the blessing than our comfort. Our pastor once preached a sermon that really hit Mark and me hard. The one line that has stuck with us is “last time I checked, God is not in the business of asking for our advice.” These are hard times that call for great faith. What an amazing thing that God finds us worthy of the journey and the calling. We are lifting you up friend!
Susan